Thirteen Days
by Driiana
Summary: Canonverse!AU *LxLight* Following the Yatsuba arc, L goes on with his plan to let a death row inmate write in the notebook to test whether or not the thirteen day rule is correct, but this time keeps it to himself. In the meantime, Light has his own plan- get close to L, and retrieve his real name at all costs... but will the two become too close?
1. Chapter 1

**1.**

Despite his initial plan to clue the task force in, he had decided against it. He had transported the note overseas, and if the timing had gone according to plan, then there was no turning back now. Watari's life had been too valuable to throw away and while his death wasn't _certain_ … its possibility was simply too much for L to bear. If the 13 day rule was a fact, then the convict shall be dead in less than two weeks from now.

It was just a matter of time until-

"Hey, Ryuzaki, has the shinigami disappeared?" Light's question forced the whole task force to begin looking around the room. L kept his head down, facing his computer. "Certainly seems that way, doesn't it…" his voice was low, and his tone lacked concern.

"Well, where's the note then?" the elder Yagami inquired, "I gave it to Watari for safe keeping." L replied. This, was not entirely a lie of course. The prisoner was only writing in the note once, and when that was over and done with it was to be shipped back, he'd only need to hide its whereabouts for _one day_. The room went silent, as he figured many of the men in the room had taken his word as fact. Light on the other hand… well, let's just say L didn't even have to turn around to know what kind of expression was surely plastered on the teen's face.

That look, was one of apprehension, as he questioned within himself whether or not to inquire about the note any further. Thankfully, his father had asked the last question without him having too, but surely the more questions he were to ask, the more likely that the heat would return to him. He had foreseen something like this happening… he knew the type of man that L was, and he was sure that the death note would be used by someone in the near future. To ensure that his memories were kept, he had taken the note from Misa, again…rendering her eyes useless. Although this fact tied up Misa's connection to the case, it also made it impossible to find out L's real name. And… since Misa was no longer in danger, Rem, who also was MIA, had no reason whatsoever to help Light.. Despite this though, Light also had a plan.

Ryuzaki turned around, and his gaze briefly met with Light's as an almost identical smile was planted on both of their faces. Light walked towards L, and took a seat next to him, as had become customary, despite the obvious tension. "Is it safe to leave Watari alone with Rem?" he asked, to which L dismissed quickly, "She had been in the room with us all this time, Light…"

He smiled once again, "Or do you need the book for something?"

Light furrowed his brows, and turned on his own laptop. Of course, he didn't have much work to do himself, and he was sure L knew that, but he had to justify his presence in some way. L was up to something, and if Light's intuition was correct- he only had thirteen days to figure out what it was.

"Ha, of course not!" Light finally replied, a bright smile lacing his face, "Say, Ryuzaki.." "Yes?" L replied, "Misa and I are going out tonight, actually feels kind of weird now that it's just the two of us, would you like to come?"

Finally, his gaze left the computer, "I'm sure Misa wouldn't be too keen on that."

Light let out a small laugh, "She'll understand! I've told her how hard you've been working since the whole Yatsuba thing…"

Light's hope for L to comply stretched well beyond a friendly gesture. L had told him weeks ago, that he had been his only friend, and despite how cold, and distant L tried to seem, Light was able to sense the loneliness that had befallen the other man. While in his state of amnesia, Light had genuinely befriended L… the two worked together, for once, on a common goal. Surely this intensified L's need for Light's friendship. Surely… this was something that could be taken advantage of. _Surely_ …..

"If you guys don't mind, I could go for some food." Light worked hard to keep his face from contorting into that now familiar ominous smile, and instead forced his features into something resembling a genuine one. "That's fantastic, Ryuzaki!" L's gaze returned to the computer screen, and light's focused on his own. " _This is perfect_." he thought,

" _I have thirteen days to get L close enough to me, that he'll let me in on where the death note is… and who has it._ "

Initially, Light was going to cancel on Misa, and pretend that she stood him up. Although an enticing option, Light reasoned that L would never go for such a ploy. He would become suspicious, and the whole plan would fall to pieces. No- he instead had to get Misa to leave early, he could tell her to… Light shook his head, now that she no longer possessed any memory of meeting, or knowing Kira, she wouldn't understand why. She would already be upset enough at L's presence, after all...

Light sighed, and leaned back in his chair out of frustration. It was then, that an idea popped into his head- " _If we arrived early_ ",- he reasoned " _it would work the same. I was supposed to meet Misa at 6, it's nearing 5 now and if we left soon I could get a good hour of his time_." Light used his earlier frustration to mock sleepiness, and got L's attention. "Is it alright if we leave in ten?" Light asked, L looked at his computer a second before nodding. "I don't see why not."

Light began to shut things off as he waited for his dark haired companion. L lowered from his usual stance, and slunk out of the chair, ending in a slumped over position as he stood. "So where are we going?" he asked, reaching his hands into his pockets, "To that cafe, downtown." Light replied cheerfully, "I thought their brownies were pretty good." He continued, to which L nodded in reply.

It took about 10 minutes for them to reach the cafe, and, as Light had planned, they had a good forty minutes to spare before Misa would be arriving. Light sat across from the other man in a booth at the back of the cafe. L had been here before, and though he didn't much care for the thoughts of others, felt more relaxed in isolation… especially to sit the way he did.

"So how does that help your reasoning?" Light asked, hoping to spark a friendly conversation "Well, my body's more relaxed this way, so my brain only has itself to focus on, I've often worried about blood clots forming in my knees… but the way I see it, I'll be dead soon anyway, so it doesn't matter…" Light gulped

"Ryuzaki… what do you mean by that?" Light could feel his heart begin to palpitate, is it possible that L had already clued into his plan? Did he mention it in an attempt to ward off Light once again, or is it just a coincidence, a vague statement to create doubt where there is none? _I mean.. We've only been here for a few minutes,_ Light thought, _there's no way L could even know that we were early… maybe he simply found my invitation suspicious to begin with_?

"Oh… nothing." L replied, "a couple things have just been bothering me lately." For the entire duration of that sentence, L focused directly on Light. His black eyes zeroing in until Light had no choice but to stare back.

"I've noticed." Light lied, "That's part of the reason I invited you out."

"Oh?" L smiled, but not at his concern, more so at the fact that it had gone noticed at all. "How did you figure that out?" he questioned, but thankfully for Light- the waitress arrived right at that moment. L continued to stare at the boy across from his as they ordered, as if he was waiting eagerly for his response. The waitress left, on her way to get two fudge brownies, a chocolate milkshake, and a honey-lemon tea, for Misa.

"What?" Light asked L, referring to the unsettling smile he'd been shooting him. "You never finished your story. How can you tell I'm feeling down?"

"Why does it matter?" Light asked, and L shrugged, "consider this a test." He replied, and Light furrowed his eyebrows. He couldn't believe how much L knew about him… he knew that Light would never back down to a challenge, no matter how petty. Light cleared his throat. "It's the sweets actually." He said calmly, not actually having any idea if his consumption of them had in fact changed at all "You're eating more, and more… it's reminiscent of cartoon females indulging in ice cream, actually."

L nodded, his smile gone.

"I see." He said simply, not indicating to Light whether or not he passed or failed. Without the praise though, Light fought hard to make sure that he had won. "Also… it's well, it's a little less noticeable…" he began "but sometimes when you think… your tongue peeks out of your mouth. I'm not sure if it's a subconscious thing… but I hadn't seen you do that before this week… it seems to only happen when you're really thinking about something… so I figured that something had obviously been on your mind."

L's eyes lit up, "very good." He said, and continued to stare intently at Light.

"You know, you confuse me, Light." He continued, after a brief moment of triumphant silence on the other mans part, "how so?" Light asked, "Every time I feel confident in the fact that you're Kira… you go and surprise me."

Light's eyes widened, "You still think I'm Kira?" he exclaimed, anger began to well up in his body, as this turn of events allowed a seed of doubt to penetrate into his plan. "Well after what you just said… I'd say it's back down to about 50 percent. Either way, we'll know soon."

Light opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by the shrill sound of Misa's voice, as his and L's names echoed throughout the cafe. In fact, her voice was all that Light could hear for the rest of the night… that, and the nagging voice inside his head, repeating L's words over and over, and over

" _Either way, we'll know soon._ "


	2. Chapter 2

**2.**

L didn't sleep that night. The notebook had arrived safely in Japan, and was tucked away somewhere that was only known to Watari. "We can confirm that it had been used correctly?" He asked over video message, to which Watari offers his 100% guarantee. "I saw it myself, Ryuzaki." He smiles sweetly at the young man. "Is something wrong with you, though?" he asks, to which L responds with a sigh. "I've never had to deal with anything like this before." He says quietly,

"Please tell me what you mean." Watari pleads, "I mean having to deal with _friends_." L says this softly, in a tone unique to him, bored and disinterested, even when he wasn't much of either.

Watari laughs immediately, "Oh Ryuzaki… don't be silly. I'm your friend after all." L smiles softly at the older man, "Not everyone is like you, Watari."

"What exactly is the problem?" he asks again, the concern imprinted on his face, as his eyebrows are pinched to the centre of his face, bringing every wrinkle forward "As much as I want- no, as much as I know that Light is Kira… there's a part of me that…"

Watari's face softens, "You would like to be right, but you would also like to remain his friend."

L looks up at the screen, finally hearing his thoughts articulated so simply. "..Yes" was all he could offer as a response.

Watari sighed, "Try to be calm until we know for sure, Ryuzaki."

"Thank you Watari," L said softly, not completely satisfied with the old man's advice "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Ryuzaki"

Despite the goodnight's though, L sat perched on his feet, staring at absolutely nothing until morning.

This was also true for Light, who, while not staring at a computer screen, also found it difficult to sleep. "If I were to tell you L's name, would you kill him right now?" Ryuk asked, teasing Light as his gaze stayed fixed on the ceiling. Finally, he rose slightly to shoot a dirty look at the shinigami, "What's that supposed to mean?" he spat, to which Ryuk laughed.

"Well look at that, still being so sensitive."

Light furrowed his brows until they had practically converged in the centre of his face, "Are you implying that you could retrieve L's name?" he asked, and Ryuk shook his head, "Against the rules." He said simply, to which Light simply rolled his eyes "Well then why bring it up?" he asked, despite knowing the answer. He wanted to hear it said out loud, because these were the thoughts that had been spinning in his head all night. He wanted to hear them to confirm how ridiculous they were, and, since they were coming from Ryuk's mouth, they were sure to seem that way.

" _You don't want L to die_." He said, "And well me neither… I can't see how this would be fun at all without him."

Light practically growled, upset not only at the truth the shinigami spoke, but now also at the fact that "I'm not interesting enough on my own?" Light shouted, and Ryuk simply stood there.

"That's not what I meant" he said, "He brings out the sportsman in you. Keeps you from becoming complacent."

Ryuk continued to smile, as Light's face contrasted sharply.

"Well I'll show you fun." Light began, "Just wait… I can tell now that Ryuzaki is starting to trust me. I will find the other death note, and I'll christen it with his name."

It was then that Light heard a knock on his door "Light," his father called to him

"Matsuda and I were going to head over to headquarters, would you like to join?" Light combed his hand through his hair as Ryuk let out a small laugh. "I'll be right there, dad!"

As they arrived at headquarters, Light ran up to L right away. "Feeling any better?" he smiled, but L simply shook his head, "No." He began, "No…i'm afraid not." Light forced a pout, and resisted every urge he had to inquire about the notes whereabouts. He looked up at the screen, and trusted that Watari had it… but feared what they had done with it. Did they burn it, and are wondering why Misa and I are still alive… or, more plausibly, had they gotten someone to write in it and are merely nervous as they wait to see if the writer will die or not.

Light gulped audibly, and L looked up at him questioningly. "Did you get any sleep, Light?" he asked, and the young man knew better than to lie to the man who was not only the world's greatest detective, but all three of them at once. "Can't say I did." He replied, "Guess I haven't been feeling myself either."

Without the death note, and with a lack of murders to investigate at all, most of the men had called it a day rather early. Most of them, with the exception of L or Light, who's positions had yet to change at all, as the pair remained hunched over their computers.

"Are you staying, Light?" Soichiro asked, to which Light simply nodded "Alright son, see you at home."

"See you, dad!" Light replied, his cracked voice a showing hints of his fatigue. L noticed, and looked over to him. "You're exhausted." He said, "Are you sure you don't want to go with the chief?"

Light shook his head, yet again "I feel bad leaving you alone." He replied, looking over to the detective and placing a hand on his shoulder. L flinched at the touch, and Light began to laugh. "I'm not going to hurt you." He reassured, squeezing gently before removing his hand completely.

Light sighed, "Someone used the death note, didn't they?" finally, L lost the fear from the previous exchange and smiled. "Impressive." He said, to which Light simply looked down at the floor.

"So you've been purposely keeping everyone in the dark… just so I wouldn't find out?"

"I haven't eliminated you a hundred percent yet." L said coldly, his hands laying on his knees as he sat perched in his chair. "If he dies… if the user dies, in thirteen days, then will you?"

L smiled, "well now that you know of my plan… nothing's certain."

Despite his sad facade, Light was smiling just as brightly on the inside. _If he could just find the users name_ … he had time on his side, but had yet to get L to play into his hands.

The two sat in silence a few more hours, before Light was having a hard time keeping his eyes open.

"Is it safe to assume you're not going home?" L asked, and Light responded with a heavy nod as he yawned once again. "Well, If you're okay with it, the room we shared before should be prepared."

"Thank you, Ryuzaki" Light hummed, standing from his chair, "I'll be up shortly." L responded, and as he walked away, Light smiled to himself devilishly. " _If he's confident enough to share a room with me_ …" he reasoned, " _then maybe that fifty percent is weaning already._."

Light faked sleep as the detective opened the door to the room, light flooded inside as the man made his way to bed. Much as everything else L did, sleeping also included a strange ritual. He took all the pillows that were on his side, and tossed them off of the bed, he then proceeded, in the same clothes he had worn for the previous three days, to climb in, and rest his head against the headboard. Light had never actually witnessed him sleeping, as his eyes would always shut far earlier than the other mans, but he did seem to think that he did in fact sleep that way.

"You're not sleeping, are you?" L asked, to which Light gulped, "No… no, I hadn't been able to."

"Hmm. Me neither."

Light took this as an allowance to sit up himself, he let out a small laugh "I almost find it weird that my wrist's free." He said, to which L looked down at his own. "I would've slept in another room, but I'm afraid-"

"Ryuzaki…" Light said gently, "That's not what I meant."

In between their words, was the calmness that the nighttime brought. The darkness was so vast, that neither man could make out each other, making every word they spoke feel almost like a secret.

"You didn't have to stay" L said, breaking the silence, "It feels wrong leaving you to do all the work… even if it is just because you're doing some sort of covert operation"

L didn't laugh, but there was a hitch in his breath that led Light to believe he was about to. "I've never been wrong Light." L said simply, and all Light could do in response was continue to offer his breath, as some sort of support to a friend that he wasn't even sure was _real_.

" _I want to be wrong, though_." L finally admitted, Light took that to mean that L did in fact find his presence comforting… feeling like the shield that the darkness offered was helping L to expose himself to Light.

"Well, if it means anything… I can assure that you are." Light lied, he heard another hitch in L's breath.

"Thirty percent" he offered in reply, and Light reached out his arm once again, tracing over pillows until finally he reached the space where there were none. Only L, and he lay his hand upon his shoulder once more. He could feel the air change in that moment, as L's hesitation towards the gesture began to fade. L brought his hand up and placed it on Light's own. Neither man moved much for a few minutes after that, taking in the warmth of each others bodies as they sat in silence.

"I really appreciate all of this, Ryuzaki." Light said, in a voice so low there was almost no differentiating it from the quiet. L took that as a sign to remove his hand, "It's no trouble." He said, noticing that Light's hand had still not moved. Neither of them understood Light's actions, as this was far beyond the realm of Light's grand plan. He snaked his hand up to the side of L's face, and ran the back of his hand along his cheek, he thought about how soft it felt for just a moment before quickly bringing it back to his side of the bed.

"I-I think I'm going to get to sleep, ryuzaki." He whispered, to which he received no reply from the dark haired man that lay beside him. He gulped, "Goodnight."

And again, no reply… and for the second night in a row… neither man got any sleep..


	3. Chapter 3

**3.**

All the morning had brought, to either men, was frustration. L was used to minimal sleep, but the man that lay beside him was not. The Light that flooded in through the large windows exposed the angry look on Light's sleep deprived face. L looked over to him, slightly distracted by his own thoughts.

"You didn't sleep." He said, to which Light returned his gaze, "Neither did you."

L sighed, facing the window. Light noticed how ethereal he looked, outlined by the sun, his hair was greasy, and the bags under his eyes a constant fixture, but in the light, he almost looked like an angel.

"What's wrong?" L asked, noticing the look without having to even turn back around.

Light decided to play into his thoughts…. It was much easier to discredit them if he used them as a part of his facade.

"You look like an angel." Light said softly, finally able to receive a somewhat genuine laugh from the other man. "I can't tell if that's some sort of joke…" he began, "Or if you're alluding to the fact that I'm not long for this world." Light rolled his eyes, "can you stop with that?" he asked, and L continued looking out the window. "Hmm? It's a fair question isn't it?"

"It wasn't either… you've got the three greatest detectives in the world living in your head, not one of them could've deduced that?" Light was finding it hard to get up, let alone argue, but L was always able to bring this kind of frustration out of him. Finally, L turned around. "Exactly… now shouldn't that tell you that I'm the one who's correct."

"Well.. Whatever you think, I'm not taking it back." The dark haired man shrugged, "fine."

L began to 'get ready' before Light had. This consisted of nothing more than ordering Watari to bring him breakfast, though. Other than that he had been ready for this morning since last week. His breakfast, if you could call it that, was a pack of smarties, black coffee, and a tub of whipped cream to keep dousing the coffee with.

"Would you like anything?" L asked, to which Light simply shook his head, L began to dump the smarties into the coffee, and by that point Light's appetite was too confused to even bother. "I'm alright, thanks Ryuzaki."

"You left some of your clothes, if you're not going home you could change into those…" L said, in between sips. Light nodded, and finally allowed himself to get up. He walked over to the drawer to remove the clothes he had left, and disappeared into the bathroom to get ready, leaving L to his thoughts.

The shower turned on, and it was only then that L was able to lower his guard. He rubbed his hand over where Light's had been last night and considered this morning's exchange. He looked over into the mirror that hung over the desk, and stared at himself for a moment. "Nothing I'd call angelic…" he thought to himself, his hand still laying upon his cheek. He balled his hand into a fist, and rested it on his knee… it had to be an act. L knew letting him in on his plan was stupid, _so stupid_ , and he now found it hard to take anything… whether it be Light, or the results from this test he was conducting, as the truth.

 _Truth…_

He continued to stare at himself, breaking that gaze only to close his eyes for a moment. "If I'm going to be able to separate fact from fiction, I'm going to have to determine what fact is for me" he reasoned. The sensation brought upon him from Light's touch came without surprise, honestly. Although he didn't feel it often, he was no stranger to attraction… albeit, it was always one-sided, but he was familiar with the feeling nonetheless. It was also no surprise, that he felt that towards Light. Even if just minutely, he had known since they had first met that it existed, and he accepted that because he knew that he had no choice. He needed to determine the facts, and, unfortunately, that was one of them. A part of him hated that he was drawn in by such an obvious person… literally everyone had that same initial reaction to the man. He was tall, he was handsome… but no…

L opened his eyes again, knowing that there was more to it then that. He had become attracted to their back and forth… to Light's intelligence. "That's why I'm not allowing myself to let this go…" he thought, disappointed in himself… he found his gaze wandering to the floor, only to return upwards as Light emerged from the bathroom.

"I didn't even realize the water had stopped…" L thought, again disappointed in the fact that he had become distracted by his thoughts so easily. Light was clothed from the waist down, but his hair was still sopping wet, so he refrained from putting his shirt on just yet.

"Your coffee's going to get cold." He said simply, as he noticed that the whipped cream had dissolved inside the drink, making the colour much lighter. The smarties had risen to the top, stripped of their colour, L nodded, scooping out another spoonful of whipped cream, and dropping it inside the glass.

Light grabbed a towel from the drawer, and began drying his hair off with it. As he did, L couldn't help himself but watch. While his own physique was boney and his colouring almost grey, Light's complexion was milky and warm. Thin, but unlike L, there was obvious definition. L looked to the ground, away from the sight before him. Finally, Light draped his shirt over his head, and was able to pay attention to L's demeanour.

"Are you alight Ryuzaki?" he asked, to which the other man had no reply. As L's back was turned to him, Light let himself smile at the sight. Had he made the world's smartest man _shy_? His smile grew, and he kneeled to the ground beside him, "Ryuzaki?" he asked again, his voice veiled with concern as his arm draped over the back of the chair. While Light sat there, waiting for an answer, L tried to think of one that would satisfy him. He didn't understand what the other man was doing… "despite the obvious one-sidedness of the relationship," L thought, "Light _was_ with Misa… and before that he had a seemingly real relationship with Takada… a relationship that he had understood was _consummated_. His interest had only ever been in women… would he go for a ploy this far out? Would he trick me with something so obviously a lie?"

"No I'm not." L said, choosing honesty. He stirred the whipped cream into his coffee, as it swirled with the melted chocolate from the dissolving smarties. His voice was casual, and Light leaned in closer, "Well, what's wrong?" he asked, to which Ryuzaki shrugged,

"I've told you before Light, I'm simply depressed."

" _Simply_ depressed?" he asked, "There's nothing simple about that."

L raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean?"

"You're crucial in solving this case ryuzaki… it'd be a shame for a mind as brilliant as yours to be tormented." L felt a pang in his chest, and spun his chair around, forcing Light to lose his grip as he stayed kneeling before L. "If it's such a shame, Light… then stop tormenting me."

His eyes were wide as he spoke this, looking down at the man beneath him as he stayed perched on his chair. Arms folded together, his lips stayed shut after that statement, while Lights own mouth hung open in disbelief. "Stop insinuating that I'm Kira." He said through gritted teeth.

"I'm trying so hard to help you."

L kept his focus on Light, as he wanted so desperately to believe him. "10 days." He said simply, "I won't believe… or condemn you, for ten days." Light sighed, lowering his head so that it rested atop L's chair. L spread his feet apart as to not get in the other man's way.

"I think I can live with that." Light breathed, he then looked up, his movements quick and sharp

"You…you didn't write in it, did you?"

L stuck his thumb in between his lips, "Now, what if I have?" he asked, cocking his head to the side "I-I wouldn't want you to die all in the sake of confirming any guilt you think I have."

"If I die, I die knowing you weren't guilty." L decided to play along, knowing that if he died, Watari would be able to apprehend Light as soon as it happened.

"Ten days…" L muttered to himself, "seems so far away…"

As Light stood up, he tried his best to ignore the sound of ryuk laughing behind him. "Ryuzaki.." He whispered, leaning towards the dark haired man, bracing himself against the arms of the chair. " _I don't want you to die._ " As he whispered these words, both men were unsure as to whether or not they had held any truth whatsoever. Light was now so close that his hair brushed against L's face. L looked up at Light with an apprehensive look on his face,

"What exactly do you want then, Light?" he asked, and Light responded by pressing his lips softly against the other mans. L refused to let his guard down, refused to close his eyes, but the kiss was soft… _so soft_ , and chaste, and when it had ended and the two men had parted once again, all L was left with… all he had gathered from the exchange, was that Light's lips were softer than they had any right to be. He pressed his fingers against the other mans lips as if asking _why_.

Why would you kiss another man, _why…why would you kiss me_? He wondered silently and questioned to himself more importantly, more earth shattering than Light Yagami kissing Ryuzaki… why was Kira kissing L?

Light grabbed L's hand with his own, and brought it away from his lips. He stared at L confidently, as he could tell by his trembling hand that the kiss had meant more to him than he was letting on.

"That's what I want." He said finally, telling the man below him what he thought he had wanted to hear. But, as those words left his lips, he had a nervous fluttering in his stomach.

" _Perhaps I should've asked watari for some food_ …" he thought, but underneath that idea was a much more confusing one. Maybe there had been some truth to what Light had said…

L broke the contact as he took his hand back from Lights grasp. "I see." Was all he made out, before Watari knocked on the door- the sound surprising both men and sending them away from each other.

"Aizawa's wondering where you are, Ryuzaki." He said upon entering the room

"Oh, yes… well Light and I will be right down."

Watari glanced over at the coffee suspiciously, after all- it was not like L to leave food untouched.


	4. Chapter 4

**4.**

"I'm so happy to see you!" Misa exclaimed, her voice drilling into Light's skull, as he took her into his arms. "You know," he began, "Sayu and my mom are visiting my grandparents tonight."

He watched as Misa's pupils grew dark with want, "Light… but I thought you-"

Light interrupted the blonde with a kiss, leaning her back against the wall as her arms wrapped around his neck. "Oh Light," she whispered, as he began kissing his way down her neck. "I've wanted this for so long." Her grip on Light's neck tightened, and they were so close that he could hear her heart begin to race. He wondered why his did not seem to follow suit.

He continued to kiss her, picking her up, and carrying her to his room as he did. It seemed though, that no matter how deeply he would kiss her, or where those kisses were planted, his heart refused to change its pace. She cupped his face within her hands, and stared into his dark, blank eyes. As he looked down at her lips, faded lipstick outlining them, he immediately wanted to stop what he was doing… but he just wiped his mouth, and shook his head at the thought.

"What's wrong, Light?" Ryuk asked, which only intensified Light's need to feel something… _anything_ that much more. He ripped his shirt off with such ferocity that all the buttons became undone at once, Misa's hands explored his chest, and soon her mouth followed suit as he began to work on her shirt. Ryuk walked around, and watched as Light fumbled with the clasp on her bra, "never seen one of those before?" he teased, to which Light responded by simply ripping the fabric apart.

After the clothes had been shed, Light flipped Misa over and onto her stomach, and took in the sight before him. Although his body had become undoubtedly aroused, he felt absolutely no interest in partaking in what had now become the inevitable….

[…]

"Are the microphones installed?" L asked, to which Watari sent him a direct uplink to the goings on in the Yagami household. "Ah, thank you very much Watari… if you would like, you may take a break. I'll study the tapes."

"Are you sure, Ryuzaki?" L nodded, "Of course."

As one computer went dark, L raised the volume coming from the other. He closed his eyes, and sat perched in the corner of his room, only to have his eyes widen moments later.

He listened in as Light's breathing became erratic, drowned out only by the moaning that was so high-pitched it could have only come from Misa… L reached for the computer to shut it off, but as Light told Misa to "be quiet!" L became entranced by the heavy sounds that Light's chest produced. He continued to sit in the corner, eyes closed, as he allowed his mind to travel to places that he was ashamed to even acknowledge.

He could hear the sound of the slapping that their skin made as they connected, and Light's breath followed the pace of their movement. L gave in to the thoughts that invaded his mind, and he allowed his hand to travel, only briefly at first, inside his own jeans. Going against the rhythm that Light had set, L's movements were much slower. Bringing his hand from the base right up to the very tip in a slow, concise movement. He didn't want to cum… he just wanted a couple moments of a pleasure that he had, up until now, never experienced.

He felt a warmth fill his body as his mind shut off, focusing solely on the sounds that made their way into his ears. He pumped with one hand, while raising the volume with the other, wanting to be consumed by that sound. His eyes were shut tight, as he fought any sounds that had been trying to escape his lips. Without noticing, his pace began to subconsciously match Light's. His pelvis arched forward with each tug, as he tried desperately to hang in as long as Light could.

Within the breathing, despite experiencing something that had taken him away from the rest of the universe, L was brought back down to reality with one hitch of Light's breath…

" _Ellee_ …" he heard, dragged out, and purposeful it was his name making its way out of Light's shaky lips. At first, L had tried to convince himself that it was just wishful thinking, that his mind had made something out of absolutely nothing…it was just one syllable after all… but no.

L was never wrong.

He sat up, and darted towards his computer, rewinding through the breathing there was an obvious peak in the sound. He played that part, and heard once again " _Ellee_ ". That sound… that purposeful roll of the tongue is not a sound related to the primal act of sex… it's not a vowel that one would moan out haphazardly.. No.

 _It was his name_. Clear, and unmistakable…

L's breath hitched as his own cold hands reconnected with his angrily warm dick. He had made a point not to cum, but as he heard Light's breathing become more rapid, and desperate, he felt a need to finish too. He lay back on the floor, and gave in to every urge his mind had shielded him from. Shamelessly, he thrusted himself against his hand to the sound of Light's voice guiding him through it…

As he heard Light let out a slight moan, he too allowed himself to finish. He felt the warm liquid stream down his length and onto the floor below him, as he convulsed in waves of pleasure. He wiped his hand on his jeans, as the cloudiness in his head began to dissipate. He had felt a true, pure feeling of elation for half a second, before the clarity brought him back to his unfortunate reality…

 _Was this just for my benefit_? He thought… Is there any way at all he could've located the microphones?

L covered his face with his hands, embarrassed. His headset still on, pushing his hair against his face.

"It's getting late." He heard finally, along with some rustling sounds as Misa was undoubtedly making her way up and off of the bed. "Oh… well, did you have fun?" Misa asked but L never heard Light's reply.

In fact, all he heard after that… were the sounds of doors closing, and finally the sound of Light has he ran the shower water, and proceeded to jump into bed. L took that as an opportunity to finally let himself have a full night's rest as well.

[…]

"Did I hear something?" Ryuk teased, standing over Light as he tried his hardest to shut his eyes. He turned over to face away from the shinigami. "Oh come on, this is no fun now." Ryuk dropped a pencil on top of Light's head, "You don't even write in the death note anymore…" Ryuk said solemnly, but Light didn't dignify him with a response.. He had told him before, he was trying to stay under the radar for now.

He hid under the blankets, but was met with even more irritation, as his mind refused to let up. He had flipped Misa over for a reason… not only so that he didn't have to see her face, but so he would be able to better picture-

No. He couldn't let his mind go there… he forced those thoughts away just as quickly as they had formed. "I'm just too good of a liar." Light explained to himself, "I'm just getting too caught up in it." He reasoned, figuring that after having sex with Misa, there was absolutely no way he could question his sexuality. The whole world had a crush on her, and she _belonged to him_. He had christened a body that was wanted by at least 50% of the planet. He tried to force a proud smile, but instead felt nothing but pain.


	5. Chapter 5

**5.**

"Any news on our convict, Watari?" L asked, in the early morning before anyone else had made it to headquarters. Watari took a sip of his tea, and set it down. The clink making its way into L's headset, as he touched it to recover from the sound, he was brought back to the night before and felt a wave of shame plague his body. He had always prided himself for his constant resolve, almost nineteen years worth of resolve destroyed and wiped away in less than ten minutes. He felt his cheeks go hot, but was interrupted by Watari.

"He's doing well, quite calm actually."

"And there's no way anyone could find out who he is?" L asked, and Watari laughed, "His case was never broadcast in Japan. He used an alias to commit the murders… only you, myself, and the warden know of his true identity." L smiled,

"I told Light that I was the one to use the note."

Watari's face went white "Ryuzaki…."

"If something happens to me… I wanted someone to know." The dark haired man's voice was quiet.

"He still doesn't know your name, ryuzaki." Watari said, attempting to console both the man on the other side of the screen, as well as himself. He often forgot that L was not his own child, and despite the lack of any biological connection, felt more concern over the boys life than he had felt for his own. Or… anything else, for that matter.

L lowered his head, "Not yet." He said, and it was then that the security system indicated that people were on their way up, "I'll talk to you soon, ryuzaki." Watari said softly, "Please be careful."

L smiled before signing off, "Be careful?" he then heard from behind him, turning around to see a very concerned looking Light.

Both men were quick to avert their gaze over their separate, but shared embarrassment. "It's nothing." L reassured him, "You look horrible."

Light approached him carefully, "I had a pretty terrible night." He said, scratching the back of his next uncomfortably. "Oh?" L asked, feigning ignorance, "What happened?"

L turned to Light to study his actions, since he had known the truth, too much of the truth to be exact… he would know for sure whether or not Light was lying to him. He immediately noticed the blush creep onto Light's cheeks as L began staring him down.

"Misa and I, well… I don't think it's going to work out."

Light was obviously itching under L's gaze, L had accepted that what he had said fit into last nights activities… but he wanted to hear more.

He told himself it was for research… but deep inside he knew that he wanted, to some extent, to be able to confirm his fantasy.

"Why not? Did something happen?" As L asked, he began playing with the skin on his thumb, pretending to be ignoring light when in fact he was doing anything but.

Light sighed, lowering his head "We slept together." He said quietly, and L's head popped up, in fake surprise. "You mean you hadn't before?" he asked, and Light shook his head, "I had promised her I would when we caught Kira… but, well…"

"But what?" L pressed, and Light simply walked closer, "Watari's still watching us, isn't he?" he asked, and L shrugged, "Well yes he has the monitors on, but I doubt he watches them 24/7"

Light rolled his eyes, "Where can I speak with you in private?" he asked, "My room." L replied softly.

"But no one has ever been in there before."

"Can you make an exception?" Light asked, and the dark haired man chewed on his bottom lip in consideration."Just this once." He finally mused, to which Light smiled.

As he followed L down a dark corridor, the existence of which had been unknown to him until now, he noticed one password protected room at the end of the hall. L pushed his thumb against the monitor, and the door opened with a loud *click*

"After you." He said quietly, extending his arm for Light to follow. As soon as Light spotted the single computer laying in the centre of the room, he knew he had hit the jackpot. Finally, he felt his heart begin to race as, if able to gain access that is, L's name was finally within his reach.

"What is it you'd like to speak with me abo-?" L asked, but before he could finish his sentence, Light had shoved him roughly against the wall. He held him there for a minute, as L kept his arm up, pressing into Light's throat. "You're fast" Light breathed, his grip loosening on L's shoulders as they began to run gently down his arms.

"You don't need to protect yourself from me." He said, his eyelids lowering as he grabbed L's arm and lowered it down to the side. L was still stoic, his body unchanged despite the close proximity… "Do you know why I don't want Misa?" Light continued, raising his hand until it became intertwined in L's thick, dark hair. L didn't reply.

Light smirked at his silence, giving the other man's hair a tug. "It's because _I want you_ …"

L finally moved, his arms reaching out until they grabbed on to Lights shirt, Light began to smile wickedly, when all of a sudden, in one fail swoop- L had spun them around, leaving Light beneath L instead.

L held onto Light's shirt and moved in closer to him, "Why are you doing this now?" he asked, in a much calmer manner than his words and actions would suggest.

"Why not before… why not during Yatsuba… when we were chained? How can this want just appear out of nowhere?"

"Does that mean you've wanted me longer, Ryuzaki?" he asks with a smirk, to which L doesn't say a thing. Light sighs, his smile forced off of his features, "It started when the chains came off.." He began, "And I realized, that I didn't want to leave…"

Finally, L feels something… a tiny something, manifesting itself in a slight shiver coursing through his body. Despite this, he still has an overwhelming want to kick him in the face.

How is such confliction even possible?

"L…" Light whispers, pressing his forehead against the other mans, "What do I have to do to get you to believe me…" he works his hands down so that they're resting on his hips, just above the waistband of his jeans… he moves slowly, as to not scare L away. "We've worked together… we found Kira together…"

L closes his eyes, "we located one manifestation of Kira together…" he corrected.

"But the murders have stopped… L, what if you're chasing a ghost?"

L let go of Light, but didn't leave his grasp. "I'll know soon." He said, as he continued to allow Light to run his hands under his shirt and up and down his body. Despite how much he had wanted to though, he refused to react to the touch. No matter how good it felt, he worked his hardest to control his breathing, his heartbeat… he needed to stay calm, he needed that control.

Those feelings became more difficult to control though, as Light's hands made their way to his zipper. Slowly, looking L in the eye as he did, he zipped it down, and tugged on them slightly.

"Light…" he whispered, but no words were to follow. Light smiled at the sight before him, L, however, had closed his eyes.

"L?" Light asked, cupping his face in his hands gently, "What's wrong?"

L had to choose his next words carefully. He didn't like that he had been exposed like this, that his _excitement_ had been made so obvious. There was no denying it now… but there was also a way to play this in his favour.

"Did you think about me last night?" he asked, although spoken confidently, it had been a rushed thought in L's mind. He was proud though, as Light seemed taken aback. "Just seems like maybe you tried consummating it with her, in order to prove something to yourself… did it go how you planned, Light?"

Lights eyebrows furrowed, "so what if I did?" he admitted, breaking himself free from the wall as he stood straight in front of L. "What if, when every time I moaned, I was moaning your name?"

L didn't expect Light to take on his challenge, "Let me hear what you mean…" he said, allowing Light to close the gap between them, " _Ellee_ …" he dragged on, the sound becoming muffled at the end as Light had finally been able to recapture L's lips in his own. His hand was allowed to wander freely as well, and it started back right where it had left off. He moved slowly, and worked L's jeans down, until they fell to the floor. Light then kneaded his hand along L's boxer covered length, feeling his nails dig into his scalp as he did. He smiled into the kiss, and began stroking L feverishly, as L continued to stand perfectly still. As he continued to, he was ignoring the heat that was building in his own groin… and his words slipped out of his mouth in a way he hadn't meant for them to. _"I want to fuck you… I want you so badly"_ he sneered, slightly annoyed at a lack of response from the other man. He pressed his lips against L's once more, and was happy to receive some form of enthusiasm, as he kissed him back.

He finally shot his hands into L's boxers and felt his whole body shudder as he pumped him into orgasm, once again, L watched as his cum dripped disgustingly down his leg, and onto the floor. He gulped as Light broke away from him, smiling.

L cleared his throat, and removed his boxers, beginning to wipe the floor with them. He stayed silent, as Light watched him from up above, he didn't like this new positioning, and pulled up his jeans as quickly as he could.

As he stood up, Light's lips made their way to his cheek, leaving a soft kiss right beside the corner of his mouth.

"Your dad and the others should be getting here soon…" L said quietly "Is there anything else you wanted to talk to me about?"

"No… No, not right now anyway." Light said, his head lowered as if feeling defeated somehow, as if he didn't' know that L was feeling he exact same way.

The two men exited the room, L following Light to make sure there was nothing he had left behind. What he was unable to notice though, was the shinigami Light had instructed to stay behind, to look for any trace of L's real name…


	6. Chapter 6

**6.**

"Did you find anything?" Light asked, as soon as he had made enough distance between himself and headquarters, he peered back just in case. "Besides dirty underwear?" Ryuk teased, to which Light groaned, "You know what I mean." He sneered, "Is there any way to get onto his computer? Are there any cameras?"

Ryuk laughed, "there aren't any cameras, or microphones." He said, and it was then that something clicked… _Microphones_. So that's how he knew… Light thought, understanding their earlier exchange better now, as L had heard everything that had gone on. He tried to ignore how that fact excited him. "What about the computer?" he asked, and Ryuk shrugged, "I don't know what you're expecting, Light… There are no boobie traps or anything."

Light pinched his nose in between his fingers as he stopped to contemplate how to deal with Ryuk's ineptitude. "So you didn't actually go on his computer?"

"I'm a shinigami, not a computer hacker." Ryuk reasoned, and Light sighed, kicking a stray stone out of his way. "But you knew that already…" Ryuk added, earning a glare from his human companion.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Light growled, lowering his voice as he passed two children, forcing a smile for their benefit which disappeared as soon as they crossed his path. "Well.. At least it seems like you definitely have his trust" Ryuk laughed, "Although… I really would've preferred if you'd continue having that kind of fun with Misa instead."

Light felt his cheeks go hot, "Can we stop talking about that?" he asked angrily, Ryuk merely laughed in response.

" _Looks like I'm going to have to get in there myself_ …" he thought, "Ryuk… I'm not going to be able to talk to you once inside, L's bugged the house again." Ryuk groaned, "Not again! What am I supposed to do with myself?"

"Well, you can eat apples still… it's just a microphone."

Light put his hands in his pockets as he continued home, ignoring the shinigami that followed him. He wondered if there was anything he could do, to use the microphone for his own benefit. No… he thought, talking to myself won't do much good, L will be able to tell that it's forced.

As he got home, he went straight to the shower, finally allowing his thoughts to wander to L… _he never touched me back_ … he thought, angry at the idea that someone like L refused to return the favour.. So to speak. Underneath that anger though, was sadness. Was L just playing into his game? Were his actions not as genuine as Light had thought?

He scrubbed the shampoo into his hair and sighed, he never thought this would be so emotionally taxing.

[…]

L spun around in his chair, still perched like a bird as he turned to face Mr. Yagami. "Soichiro?" he asked, despite his mouth being full of animal crackers, "Can you explain to me please, Light's history with women?"

Mr. Yagami looked obviously taken aback, "How is this relevant, Ryuzaki?" L shrugged, "It's important to understand, so that we can further investigate his relationship with Misa Amane" he lied. Mr. Yagami sighed, "So Light hasn't been cleared yet?"

L popped another few animal crackers in his mouth, "Don't worry… we are getting close to ruling him out."

"Fine… well, he is still young, Ryuzaki. I'm afraid there isn't much to speak of."

"Do you know anything about his relationship with a miss Takada?" he asked, and Lights father shook his head. "Okay, so perhaps you're the wrong person to ask." L spun his chair back around, facing the monitor.

"I apologize if my 18 year old son doesn't tell me _everything_ …" he said, to which L smirked. "Yes, I guess that could be uncomfortable."

L then raised the volume on the Yagami monitor, and plugged the feed into his headphones, listening in once again, as Light lay in his bedroom.

"What's that now?" Mr. Yagami asked, as L continued looking at the sound waves on the screen. "They're only microphones." He said, and Soichiro groaned. "Do as you must."

Of course though, L never needed his permission… he would be listening the same whether Soichiro had allowed him to or not, and this did give the older man a significant amount of stress. Despite this though, Mr. Yagami had children at home… and, despite what L thought, he did understand the teenage psyche quite well. As he began putting on his coat to leave, he looked over L, and felt bad for the young man.

"Ryuzaki" he called, "hmm?" L asked,

"Since you'd be listening in anyway… would you like to join my family for dinner?"

L spun around once again, and considered his options. "Are you only asking me because you're assuming I'll say no?" L asked, to which Soichiro rolled his eyes.

"I'm asking you, not only as my colleague, but as my sons friend."

"I'd enjoy that."

[…]

"Light!" his mother called from outside his door, "I'm studying" he replied back, an obvious lie as she opened the door to discover him under the covers. She flicked on the light, "Light, your father's coming home for dinner… I'd like it if you were there too."

Light groaned, sitting up and adjusting his eyes to the light that now flooded his room, feeling as if it was all focused directly into his eyes. He hopped out of bed, and followed his mom down the stairs. Sayu had already set the table, and was sitting in her usual spot, the only difference- was that there had been an extra place set.

"Is dad bringing Matsuda home again?" Light asked, to which the mom shook her head "No sweetie, your father mentioned a name I hadn't heard before… Ryu…"

"Ryuzaki?" Light said, his eyebrows raised as he did, to which his mom smiled "Yes! That's it! Your father did say you knew him too?"

"Oh, yes… he was the other speaker at our entrance ceremony." Light said honestly, and his mother formed an "o" with her mouth, obviously impressed. "I didn't know another student received a perfect score?" she asked, but Light didn't have the opportunity to reply, as the beep of his father's car interrupted their conversation.

"Honey, go greet your father." Sayu obeyed, and walked over to open the door "Daddy!" she exclaimed, as Soichiro greeted her with a tight hug. Behind them, was L. His eyes wandering around the house that he had only seen before through a screen, "hmm…" he began "it looks so much bigger…"

"So much bigger than what?" Light asked, L smiled at him as he was acknowledged. "So much bigger on the inside." L lied, his eyes staring directly into Lights, making the other man noticeably uncomfortable.

"Ryuzaki, was it?" L nodded, his hands in his pockets as he walked fully into the home, Lights mom placed her hand on his back and guided the hunched over man to the table "Light was telling me that you were his co-speaker at the university's entrance ceremony?"

L nodded, and he sat down in between Light's parents, and across from Sayu and Light. Light was surprised at his normal posture, as well as the blush on his face.

Soichiro had noticed the same thing, "Please make yourself at home, Ryuzaki." He said, but L's position stayed the same. "So you're working with my husband?" Light's mother's barrage of questions continued throughout dinner, as Light and his father watched a different, slightly more shy version of L come out. Of course, his mother did respect intelligence, and L was probably one of the most intelligent men on the planet, so her compliments were seemingly endless.

"You know, Light has helped his father with a few cases as well." L looked over to Light and smiled, "Oh yes I've heard about those… Light's actually given us some insight on this case as well…he's very good."

It was with those words that a blush now crept upon Light's own face. He cleared his throat, "Oh… I'm just there to confirm Ryuzaki's theories." But even as he spoke to his mom, L kept staring at him, sending a shiver down his spine.

"You don't like vegetables, do you Ryuzaki?" Lights mom joked, as she cleared away the plates. Everything on L's plate had been eaten except for the salad and green beans. "No, I can't say I do… everything was fantastic though, Mrs. Yagami." She smiled, "I really appreciate this." Soichiro placed his hand on L's back "You're welcome anytime."

"Umm, mom, would you mind making Ryuzaki and I some tea? I thought we could study a bit up in my room."

His mom smiled brightly, "No problem dear! You two have fun."

Light allowed L to walk ahead of him, as he already knew exactly where he was going. As they made their way to Light's bedroom, Light closed the door behind them, and pushed L against his wall. "What are you doing here?" he asked, to which L smiled "Your father invited me… why would I bother intruding otherwise?"

Light let him go, "I found these." He said, opening his curtain to reveal the nearly microscopic microphones, "So I'm sorry if I'm a tad suspicious."

L smiled, "very impressive. I didn't think you'd notice if I didn't bother with cameras."

Light sat down on his bed with his arms crossed, as L perched himself up on Light's computer chair. "Your family's so normal." He said, staring over at Light's bedroom door.

"I mean, I've known your father of course to be normal… but seeing you all together…"

"You don't have much family… do you?" Light asked, as L's gaze reconnected with his. Despite the sad subject matter, L's tone was unwavering as always "None actually, well, beside's Watari I suppose…" Light shook his head,

"I'm sorry."

L was about to reply, but Light kept talking, "I'm…since I'm apologizing, I'm sorry for yesterday too…"

L's opened mouth was then forced shut by shock, "I just wanted to touch you…I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.."

" _I've just never had anyone touch me before._ "

The two men were then interrupted by Light's mom, carrying a large tray with two cups of tea, a bowl of sugar cubes, and a tiny cup of milk. "It's very hot, be careful boys!"

"Thank you Mrs. Yagami." L said politely, taking the bowl of sugar cubes before even looking at the cup of tea. After she left, Light got up, and locked his door. L had already popped a sugar cube into his mouth, he watched Light carefully, as he began walking towards him.

"You've been in my room all this time, and haven't done any investigating."

He loomed over the dark haired man with a smile, but L simply shrugged. "If I wanted to, I have many other ways to do that." He said simply, pushing the cube against the inside of his cheek with his tongue, as he made way for a second.

"I don't understand you…" Light said,

"Yes you do. You wouldn't have ever located the microphones if you didn't…" L popped another sugar cube into his mouth. "That's why this whole situation's so problematic… don't you see?"

If Light had agreed with L, as he in fact had, he would've been practically admitting that he was indeed Kira. Instead, he said nothing. Which was probably just as devastatingly obvious.

"I still don't understand why you're going through these kinds of lengths…" Light asked,

"You're going to be dead in a week."

L smiled, "I'm willing to risk that."

Light gritted his teeth, what else was there to say to a madman? He knew that L had driven him into a corner, there was no 13 day rule. Both men knew that at this point, and Light was only going by L's word… which he knew could be as flimsy as his own. _What if this was merely a lure? What if he only told me about it because he never did write in the book to begin with? If I'm the only one who knows, and he mysteriously dies of a heart attack at the age of 18, then I will be the only one to blame._

And… if I'm wrong about that, then my time is running out. I need to find out his name, but that seems impossible at the-

L gulped loudly, breaking the silence that had been growing between them. "I told you Light, if I die being wrong about all this, then I die happy."

"But then you also die for no reason…"

"Is your absolution not reason enough?"

Light tightened his grip on the chair's arms to the point where he could feel his palms begin to turn red.

"No… no, L it's really not."

"Ten percent." L replied, "Anyway, I promised Watari that i'd be returning…"

"If you wouldn't mind," Light offered "I can walk you back."


	7. Chapter 7

**7.**

"My mom loves you." Light said, as they walked off into the darkness, L was hunched over, hands in his pockets as usual. "She's a sweet woman." He said simply. As they continued on in silence, L took this time to compile his thoughts on how the night had turned out. _Light has still made no obvious effort to learn my name_ … he thought. Despite the physicality, that hadn't even seemed to have come up at all…

He looked over to his friend, who was looking ahead of them, and wondered if this game was all for naught. Whether it was two-sided, or one… they both seemed to be getting something out of it… and that something was very obviously not information.

Yes, L's plan was reliant on time, but he had assumed Light would've made some sort of move by now… but no. Yes, in L's mind Light had undoubtedly been Kira at some point in time… but maybe those memories had long ago faded away. In fact, he had seen the change in Light's features as he had watched them fade away…

"Light…" he started, "Yeah, Ryuzaki?" the slightly taller man replied, his extra height only due to his perfect posture. "Would you like to stay over again tonight?" he asked, and he could immediately sense the surprise on Light's face. Light scratched the back of his head, "Yeah… of course."

As they got to headquarters, L immediately informed Watari of their guest, and continued on as he led Light down that same, now familiar corridor. He pressed his thumb against the sensor, and allowed Light to enter before him. L walked over to the mattress that lay in the corner of the room, and sat cross-legged upon it. He closed his eyes for a second, as Light joined him, and as soon as the other man sat down with him, he opened them, and for the first time, was the one to initiate the kiss.

Light's hair once again brushed against his own face, tickling his forehead, and he was once again taken aback by the softness of the other mans lips. Despite Light not being ready to part just yet, L ripped apart from him, and instead, extended his hand.

"I want to start over." He said simply, and Light took his hand.

"I'm L… L Lawliet."

Immediately, Light took his hand back, practically jumping off the mattress, "Why… why would you tell me that?" he asked, and L merely shrugged. "I find that at this point there's no use hiding it."

Light tries his best to ignore Ryuk's laughter, as he felt overwhelmed by L… no, by _Lawliet's_ confession.

"I don't think I've ever truly introduced myself to anyone…" he said, bringing his thumb to his lips, as Light continued to look at him in awe. There was no plan for this, Light had never imagined this scenario within his wildest dreams. Despite how long and hard he had been chasing it, with it in his grasp he felt lost…

Light cleared his throat, and came up with a plan.

He furrowed his eyebrows, "So this is why you invited me…" he asked, "What are you expecting?" he extended his arm "A 'Hello Lawliet, I'm Kira?"

"No." He said softly

"I actually feel like I've been too narrow-minded… take this as my apology."

Again, Light didn't know how to react. "Plus… as I'll be dead in a few days, I thought someone might as well know."

"L…" light said softly, rejoining the other man on the bed. "Can you please stop saying that…"

He closed his eyes, as L reached up to cup his face once more, but this time he did not kiss him. Instead, he leaned back, and allowed Light's head to fall onto his chest, finally allowing the two to have a good night's rest.

[…]

As Light woke up, he saw L sitting in the middle of the room, eyes fixed on the computer. Light smiled softly, and rubbed his tired eyes, for a moment… he had forgotten about everything. Seeing L there as he woke up, felt so right that he never wanted to remember, in fact.

But then… there was Ryuk. And everything flooded back, despite the fact that he hadn't used the book in weeks now, he was still Kira. That truth would always remain.

"Good morning, Light." He then heard, as L turned back to look at him, "Oh… Good morning Ryuzaki." He said with a smile.

"What are you doing?"

L shrugged, "just watching the cameras inside of Yatsuba… I do that from time to time, but the remaining six don't seem to interact with each other much anymore…"

"I think that was the most fun I've ever had." Light said, surprised at the honesty that came with it. L looked up at him, and smiled lightly, "me too."

It was then that an idea popped into Light's head… a horrible, convoluted plan that he tried to shake out of his mind moments after its conception. " _It'd be so easy_ …" he thought, " _to kill L inside headquarters._ "

 _There are cameras everywhere… so my involvement would be ruled out. It could be written down as some sort of technical error… he was always on a computer… or diabetic shock, maybe even choking…God know's he shoves those candies in his mouth way too…_

He shook his head again. No. _Surely he told someone that he was going to reveal himself to me_ \- in fact, he wouldn't be surprised if L had been speaking to Watari as he slept.

As long as he was Kira… there'd be a part of him that wanted L dead. He drummed his fingers over the face of his watch as he thought about what to do next. What if… he were to forfeit the notebook once again.

Misa had already forfeited hers, so there would be no connection whatsoever to Light any longer. Light rested his head upon the pillow once again as he tried to think this through as deeply as possible.

 _Of course then, L wouldn't die and I'd be trapped as a suspect for a crime I don't remember committing_ …

L walked back towards the bed, and lay right beside Light, not touching him, or anything like that… but instead, just sharing the silence as he too contemplated his next steps.

"Lawliet's a nice name." Light said finally, "It's unique…."

"Like yours?" L added, to which Light smiled, and turned his head to face the other man's "Yeah." Light draped his arm around L, and L stiffened slightly. "You always do that…" Light said quietly, a slight hitch in L's breath led Light to believe that he was forcing back a laugh.

"I'm not completely used to it yet." He said, but as Light began to snake his arm away, L grabbed it. "That doesn't mean I don't like it…"

[…]

"Ryuzaki… what's wrong?" Watari asked, as the dark haired man slunk his way into Watari's office. "Ryuzaki?" He repeated, as L leaned against the door frame.

"I have a problem." He said softly, and Watari walked over to the younger man, "What is it?" Watari inquired gently, watching as L's hair swung over his face as he lowered his head. "What if… what if L were to…to love Kira?" he asked, and Watari wrapped his arm around him.

"You're speaking of you and Light?" he questioned, and L nodded. "I was led to believe that Mr. Yagami had lost his memory of that-"

L shook his head, "No.. It's still there. Everything's still there…" Watari sighed, "How can you trust the boy then?" he asked, as L dropped to the floor, crouching atop his feet. Watari sunk down with him, albeit a lot slower.

L laughed quietly to himself " _I told him my name_."

"Ryuzaki…" Watari scolded, fear evident in his voice, "I'm still alive aren't I?"

"He might think that it's just part of a plan…"

L shook his head, "No… no, if it is truly Kira then he'd kill me no matter what. He's smart enough to fake the rest later."

"And if our convict doesn't die?" Watari asked, to which L's smile began to fade, "Then we'll have enough reason to arrest him." He said simply, "Nothing I can do about that."

"And that's how you believe it will play out?" Watari asked, to which L nodded. "I don't see any other way, really."

He looked up at Watari, "I've thought about this a lot…" the old man laughed, "Isn't that true for everything you do?" he asked, L smiled. "In a couple days, I will be dead, or Light Yagami will be arrested." Watari squeezed his shoulder

" _I no longer know which one I fear more_ …."


	8. Chapter 8

**8.**

L had left Light inside his room. His computer on, headset still attached… "You have his name… you have his computer…" He looked over to Ryuk as he stood in the corner of the room.

"Come on Light… what's stopping you?" he teased. Light furrowed his brows, and, as if to prove something- walked carefully over to the computer. He sat in front of it for a while in consideration… He longed to use the notebook again, he knew that as long as he knew of it's existence it would have a special place in his heart. He wanted control… he wanted to be a _God_ …

But here he was… access to all the information he'd ever need, and he found himself unable to process it.

He slammed his fist against the floor in frustration. "Damn it, L." He sneered, hating the way his body would contort in ecstasy at the mere sound of his name. The slouched over, messy, frog-like man who had no semblance of social skills whatsoever…

And he alone had the ability to effect Light in this way.

He felt a shudder of pleasure as his finger tips connected with the keyboard, he pictured how delicately he would write L's name in his notebook, how he would leave it on a page all by itself. No… he couldn't do that. The pleasure faded as he became saddened at the thought of L being alone in any state… if he had learned anything this past week, it was that L truly craved company, no matter how hard he'd convinced himself otherwise. He saw how he acted differently in front of him, in front of his family… and he brought his hands off the keyboard, and up to his face, shielding the tears that he had been working so hard to fight back.

He weighed every possibility of every action that had formed in his brain, and none…not one single conclusion was a happy one. His hands worked past his face until they had ran through his hair, spiking it out at the sides, and making him look crazed. He wanted to tell L that he was Kira… but he knew, that much like himself, L wouldn't be able to handle that information. He too wanted to win, after all. Light couldn't help himself as he laughed at the irony, all of this pain he had been going through because he had finally found someone exactly like him. And it was because of these similarities, and them alone, that everything was falling to absolute pieces.

He looked at the computer screen, and noticed that L was watching everyone, and everything… he had monitors set up in places that lacked any connection to Kira whatsoever. Yatsuba, Misa's apartment, every room in headquarters, Aizawa's car, the park across the street…

Light sighed, walking back over to the mattress and landing face first on top of it. He unwound his watch and stared at the piece of unassuming paper that lined the secret compartment. He felt comfort in having it on him, knowing he had the power to stop any heart indiscriminately… he knew that L would love his new world… but he also knew that something would be off if L wasn't in it.

[…]

"Where'd Ryuzaki go?" Light asked, having finally made his way out of L's room. "He's on the roof." Matsuda said, motioning to the exit door in the corner of the room. Light heard the sound of the rain become more and more persistent the closer he got, until finally he was standing outside in the brunt of it. He noticed L immediately, staring intently at what seemed to be nothing.

"Ryuzaki!" Light called out, to which L held his hand to his ear, unable to hear him "Ryuzaki!" Light tried again, only to receive the same gesture. Light rolled his eyes, and ran out to him instead, becoming immediately soaked.

"What are you doing out here?" Light asked, to which L merely shrugged. "Don't you think it's nice?" he asked, but Light couldn't see what he meant at all, "You mean the rain?"

L finally turned to him and smiled, "How everyone's inside when it rains…" he clarified, staring out into the empty streets.

"Ryuzaki.." He started, causing L to shake his head, "You don't have to call me that anymore."

"L…" Light began, "Lawliet… I mean" L's mouth contorted into a smile once again

"Do… do you have fun chasing Kira?" L brought his thumb to his mouth… "Shhhhh." He said, "Do you hear the bells?"

The two men stayed quiet as Light tried to hear bells…or, anything for that matter, over the sound of the rain. "I don't hear anything…" he said, and L smiled. "Isn't it beautiful."

Light put his arms on L's shoulders and spun him around to face him, "Lawliet." He said again, "Do you enjoy this? Do you like to chase Kira?" L shrugged Light's arms away from him. "I don't know how to answer that." He began,

"If I say yes… well then that's basically saying I enjoy having hundreds of people die each day for my benefit… and really, that makes me no different than Kira himself."

"But if you say no?" Light asked, to which L then met Light's gaze, "well if I say no… then I'd be lying."

Light gulped, "Have you heard anything about your prisoner?" he asked, and as he did, L's eyes widened. Light allowed a smile to appear on his own face, as both men understood what this was-

A confession.

"Light…" L whispered, stepping back from him, "Lawliet.. Tell me his name. Let me kill him." Light closed his eyes, waiting for L's response. "I'm putting it in your hands… I'll kill him so that no one thinks its me, and then I'll forfeit the notebook, and no one will ever know."

"I'll know." L said, to which Light laughed, closing the gap in between them "You've always known." He whispered, bringing his lips to the other mans, without L knowing why, he kissed back, with more excitement than he'd ever felt before. He wasn't ready to answer light yet… either way, he knew that the loss would be huge, it would be either his self-respect, or…

"I love you." Light said into the kiss, causing L to lose his train of thought. Light rubbed his body roughly against L's own to the point where neither man could stand it anymore. L picked Light up, and carried him until they were underneath the awning. He lowered Light onto the wet pavement, and continued kissing him as they lay together on the floor. Light rolled over until he was on top of L and began kissing his neck until it bruised. L refused to make a noise, but instead grabbed Light, and pulled him as close to him as was possible.

Light began thrusting himself agains L, the friction causing them both to finally lose control. L began lifting Light's shirt over his head, and when it finally came off, he arched forward against Light, who had begun undoing his belt.

"If you're going to put me away… I'd rather you kill me." Light seethed into the other mans ear, his movement never stopping as he did. It was only then that L found himself unable to fight back a moan. As Light's pants were lowered, he began working on L's pulling them down until his red, throbbing cock had been exposed. L hissed as his boxers slid off, Light immediately began stroking himself, as he lowered to a position in which he was able to take L in his mouth.

"You couldn't have forfeited the book before this?" Ryuk said in the background, a comment which Light simply ignored.

After less than a minute, L pulled Light up by his hair. Light stared at the other man questioningly, as he forced Light to his feet. L remained on his knees, as he grabbed the back of Light's thighs.

" _I've never gotten to touch you_ …" he said, barely audible as the sound of the rain drowned him out. It was then that he took Light in his hand, and pumped slowly, staring at it intently, as he felt nervous about what he was about to do next

"You don't have-" Light started, but was interrupted as L's lips attached themselves to his length. Light found it hard to stabilize himself, and fell backwards against the wall. He shut his eyes tightly as he explored L's thick, dark hair with his hands, pushing him down further, and further until his entirety was in the other mans mouth.

"I'm Kira" Light moaned, and, at his surprise, L started sucking harder, to the point where Light could feel himself about to cum

"Stand up" Light instructed, he turned L around, and pushed him against the wall, "You're so beautiful." Light said, pulling L's head back so they kissed as Light entered L from behind. He continued to say that too, over and over… It didn't take long for either of them after that, a few thrusts for Light, with his hand practically choking L's own dick with each movement.

As the men finished, L turned around, and pulled Light into another kiss, as he felt that the moment they parted, he would have to be prepared to say goodbye to Light…and Kira forever.

As L shivered though, Light broke the kiss, and moved his hand up to the other mans cheek, "you're cold…" he said simply, to which L just looked down at the ground, embarrassed. Light opened the door to the stairwell, as he grabbed their clothes off the floor,

"Come on." He said softly, as the two of them embarked back inside,

Back to reality…


	9. Chapter 9

**9.**

Light sat beside L on the staircase, as the two began wringing out their shirts. As they had finally gotten their sopping wet clothes back on, Light grabbed L's hand.

"You never gave me an answer." He said softly, L squeezed back "there isn't one." He said simply. "Kira wants to kill L, and L wants to kill Kira…"

Light shook his head, "but Light would do anything for Lawliet." L's eyes set their sights on the floor, as the two men found themselves once again cloaked in the comforting silence.

L's phone then rang, the tone was loud, and sharp and broke the pair away from each other…

"It's Watari…" L said, flipping the phone open.

Light could only watch as L's eyes began to widen. He turned towards Light, and gulped, "We'll be right there." He said simply, flipping the phone shut and bringing Light to his feet. He didn't clue him in, but instead just stared at him carefully.

"Uh oh…" ryuk said in the background, as the pair took off after L, "Maybe the old man saw you on his computer…"

As the two made their way to the main floor, everyone in the office looked at the soaking pair questionably. L turned on the monitor and dove into his chair, he disconnected his head set, and allowed Watari to speak with everyone. He turned to face L, and as he did Watari's voice boomed.

"Your prisoner was found dead today, ryuzaki." He said simply, "A heart attack… right at 12:35."

Mogi, Matsuda, Soichiro, and Aizawa stared at the screen with even more questions clear on their face. "Prisoner… you mean…L" Soichiro began, looking back and forth between L and his son

"You mean Light is cleared?"

L smiled as he stared at Light, "Yes…" he said simply "It appears that the thirteen day rule is in fact _real_ …"

L couldn't dispute this fact… no matter how hard he tried to reason that it couldn't be… that Light was in fact not Kira… he couldn't get around this rule. He disappeared to his room, as everyone else had celebrated back in the lobby.

"Ryuzaki?" Light asked, from outside the door, forcing L out of bed as he walked to open it.

Light knew that L was saddened that everyone was, in essence celebrating the fact that he was, for the first time… wrong. He cupped his face, and kissed him on the forehead. "I don't know how that prisoner died." Light said,

"I wish I-" L stopped him, "there's no need Light… you're free."

Light sighed, and took his watch off carefully, he pressed the knob four times, allowing L to watch as the secret compartment pulled open. L looked Light in the eyes, an uncontrollable smile making its way across his face… He took out the paper, and pressed it against L's hand. L's smile didn't waver as he looked over to the shinigami.

"Kira…" he said quietly, in complete amazement.

"You beat me." He finished, to which Light shook his head. "Like I said…" Light began "You've always known this to be true."

"But…" Light placed his finger upon the other mens lips,

"Ryuk." Light began, "This is goodbye." He takes the tiny piece of paper, and hands it to the shinigami. L watches as Light looks on with a veiled sadness. "Are you sure?" he asks, to which Light nods, pulling the dark haired man close.

The two press their lips together, as Ryuk slinks away "goodbye Light…" he says, "Thanks for the fun."

As the two men finally part, L notices a different look in the other mans eye, as he smiles at L with a peace he's never seen on the has face before.

"I love you, Light." L says bringing his head down onto his shoulder.

"I love you too." Light replies, "Do you want to go out and celebrate with the others?" he asks, and L snorts out a small laugh…

"I'd love to."

[…]

"Rem" watari speaks, "would you like your notebook back?" the shinigami looks surprised, "But you've only used it once…"

Watari shrugs, "I will only ever need it this once." He clarifies, to which Rem grabs the notebook.

As Watari's memories of killing the prisoner are forfeited, his memory of L sleeping happily with Light remain. He looks on to the party and smiles as the two speak with each other in the corner.

"I'm so happy for you, L." He says lowly. Sitting back down in his chair, and turning off the monitor.


End file.
